It's not fair!
by Nigika
Summary: Jyushimatsu is sick and the only one around to care for him is Ichimatsu.


Even now Ichimatsu could hardly believe he'd ended up in this situation. It all began on a Saturday five weeks ago when all their brothers were out and their parents on a weekend trip, leaving only him and his only-by-a-few-minutes-younger brother Jyushimatsu alone in the house. Well... looking back now, it wasn't like there hadn't been any signs before. Amongst all brothers him and Jyushimatsu had always been particularly close, but that didn't prepare him in any way for what happened on that fateful day.

 _It was unfamiliarly quiet in their house, which was usually filled with noises from everyone's laugther and banter all around the clock. But now, when Ichimatsu returned home from his usual stroll around the neighborhood to spend time with the local cats, it was peacefully quiet. Osomatsu and Karamatsu had gone to the local horse-racing stadium, Chorormatsu had said something about a newly opened idol shop and Todomatsu was probably hanging out with some girls with no chance of a relationship. And Jyushimatsu- Jyushimatsu had been feeling sick and was lying unusually calm on the couch in the living room. It wasn't like Jyushimatsu's fever was especially grave. Besides, the others had already made Karamatsu buy antibiotics at the local pharmacy for him, so there wasn't anything to be worried about. Having to spend the whole day inside even though it was finally sunny outside after many days of rain had put him in a bad mood. Until some hours ago their second eldest brother had been taking care of Jyushimatsu, but he was soon persuaded to accompany Osomatsu to the stadium. By then all the others had already left the house._

 _When Ichimatsu passed the living room to grab a drink from the refrigerator, he heard Jyushimatsu's voice calling him, disturbing the rare silence._

 _"Ichimatsu-nii-san!"_

 _The third youngest brother halted and went to the living room to look for his brother. Jyushimatsu was now sitting on the couch with a blanket curled around his body._ _He was looking at him somehow accusingly._

 _"Ichimatsu-nii-san! I'm cold!"_

 _Ichimatsu returned his gaze with a helpless expression. His brother's stare was demanding, as if he wanted_ ** _him_** _to do anything about it. But what was he supposed to do in a situation like this? Maybe Jyushimatu's fever was more grave then he had initially thought. Fuck! Why was he_ ** _now_** _of all times the only sibling in the house? One of the others probably would have had an idea how to handle an ill person. But_ ** _he_** _of all people wasn't the right person when it came to comforting or helping others._

 _"Ahh...uhmm...", he stumbled, his voice hoarse because he was using it for the first time today. He was already feeling the stress building up inside him from being confronted with this enervating situation when fortunately Jyushimatsu interrupted him._

 _"Come here!"_

 _So Ichimatsu obeyed and sat down on the couch next to his brother hesitantly._

 _"I'm still cold!", Jyushimatsu stated in his usual simple matter-of-fact tone. "Why did you leave me alone? That's mean! It's so quiet! I hate that! And it's cold."_

 _Now that he mentioned it, Ichimatsu also noticed it. It really was colder than it normally was. Well, of course it had to be, because the others weren't there. More people meant more bodies radiating heat. On top of that Jyushimatsu was sick. He shouldn't have left him alone and he was feeling truly sorry for it._

 _After some time he managed to say: " Sorry..."_

 _"Nah, it's okay. You're here now!" It seemed his brother had already cheered up a bit. Upon that Ichimatsu cracked a little smile. He was relieved the situation had resolved quickly._

 _"I'm still cold though."_

 _The slightly older one didn't even have a chance to reply this time because Jyushimatsu had already dragged him down into a tight hug._

 _"Wha- "_

 _Lying half on top of his brother, Ichimatsu realized how warm Jyushimatsu felt even though he had stated he was cold. He could also smell the other's unique scent. Wasn't it odd that they all smelled differently even though they had the same genes, lived under the same roof and used the same washing powder?_

 _Thinking about it, he couldn't remember the last time being so close to anyone. It must have been when they were still children. Most likely it had been with Jyushimatsu as well, because back then they used to hang out together quite often. Had he actually missed this? Closeness, feeling the warmth of another person, hugging-_

 _That's when something inside him clicked. He couldn't say why; it was probably a knee-jerk reaction because of the unfamiliar situation, the stress that had built up and most probably because he really was a psychopath just like everyone always said. But in the end it all came down to one thing and that was: he didn't think at all at that moment. They were close, too close. Jyushimatsu's warmth, his funny smile, his lips... He had leaned in to his brother and kissed him. Only for a few seconds, until the realization kicked in and he pulled back immediately, but he had done it. His heart was probably racing faster than any horse his brothers had seen all day._

 _A million possible excuses for what had just happened popped up in his mind, reaching from "Sorry, I was feeling dizzy" to "I heard that in some other country it's a tradition to warm people up like that" and Jyushimatsu being... well, Jyushimatsu, would have probably believed him. But before he could even open his mouth to say anything his brother sat up, grabbed him by the shoulder and_ ** _kissed him back eagerly_** _and all the things that had been tumbling through his mind just a second ago were washed away in a heartbeat._

And that's how it had all begun. Ichimatsu made Jyushimatsu swear never to tell anyone about it, no matter what. At first it felt like a thrilling adventure to hide from their family whenever they happened to repeat their secret intimacy. But as time passed the thrill was lost and it became more and more of a nuisance having to hide every single time. And it wasn't like they could ever change that sitiation. After a while Ichimatsu had come to accept his strange relationship with his brother. He hated society anyway, so he didn't give a shit about their morals. The fact that he was a scumbag and didn't fit into society's standards was something he'd already accepted a long time ago. But still, for Jyushimatsu's sake, who enjoyed going out and meeting other people and who was respected as a good sportsman, he couldn't allow anyone finding out about what they were doing. Ichimatsu couldn't even say what kind of relationship he and Jyushimatsu had because no words or titles seemed to be fitting for them and maybe that was okay because it was good the way it was and words were unnecessary.

Now he was home alone, waiting for Jyushimatsu to return from a morning baseball match. It was the first day since that particular Saturday five weeks ago on which they would be alone for several hours. Their parents were out for dinner, Todomatsu for a gokon, Choromatsu left for an idol concert, Osomatsu went to a pachinko bar and Karamatsu... well who knew what he was doing but he wasn't at home. The thought of getting to enjoy some time not just without the majority of his annoying brothers but with Jyushimatsu made Ichimatsu embarrassingly happy.

So when the door finally opened and Jyushimatsu stood in the genkan, beaming him a wide smile followed by a "Tadaima! Did you wait for me, Nii-san?", he returned his smile and even hugged his younger brother, which was a rare thing for him to do.

"You missed me so much! Hehe. I'm happy!" With that, Jyushimatsu lifted him up as if he was a bag of groceries and carried him inside the house.

"O-oi..."

But he didn't protest.

* * *

Just a short while later they were sitting on the couch in the living room, snuggled together side by side, with a single blanket wrapped around both of them. There was a funny show on TV with a large group of people participating in some kind of obstacle race while often running against walls or bumping their heads, which lead to them tripping and falling down in huge numbers, making them look like a bunch of stupid ants. They both loved this show and laughed whenever some idiot ran into a wall. It was very cozy and enjoyable. Ichimatsu really liked evenings like this. Too bad it rarely was as peaceful when everyone was at home. Someone was always quarreling or there was a fuss over what to watch on the TV. With just Jyushimatsu it was different. If he could just spend more days like this, at least with Jyushimatsu close by his side, he'd be a lot calmer and ignoring some of the quarreling might be less stressful. But he was denied that kind of life. They were denied their happiness – if such a sappy thing actually existed.

"It's kind of... unfair..."

The words slipped from Ichimatsu' mouth.

"He-? What is?" Jyushimatsu sligthly tilted his head with a questioning look.

"You know... us... having to hide... and stuff... being born as brothers..."

Jyushimatsu turned round to look him into the eyes. His eyes were sparkling.

"But I don't think so! It's very good! You were always there with me from the moment I was born! We were always together!", he declared, his voice full of conviction.

Ichimatsu's eyes widened. He'd never thought about it like that. "You... really think so?"

"Yeah! And I never want to be without you! I love you, Ichimatsu-nii-san! I want to stay with you forever!"

The older brother felt a single tear run down his cheek.

"Me too."

*~* End *~*

* * *

 **Jyushimatsu and Ichimatsu are so cute together! Help me! I can't take it! Q/Q I just had to write a little one-shot about them!**


End file.
